Like most children when I was young, it was tough getting me to eat. So my mum (and my aunt assigned to take care of me) would come up with many ploys to get me to eat up. This was one of their tricks. They told me I didn’t get to eat my protein until I had finished all the carbs. And because they didn’t want to have to go dish out the meat separately they would hide it at the bottom of the pile. I just caught myself hiding meat at the bottom of my children’s bowl of jollof rice and burst out laughing.
This got me thinking about so many other things I thought I wouldn’t do as a mum or would do differently. You know that moment when Hubs tells you that you sound just like your mother? Well, I find myself having many of those moments lately. Here are 9 things I thought I wouldn’t do as a mum. I’ll start with the obvious
1. Hiding meat at the bottom of the plate.
I mean this doesn’t do anything. A child like J would just dig it out eat it and leave the rest for you to deal with.
2. Screaming for my kids to come get the remote from the coffee table right infront of me.
I swear I almost yelled M’s name to come get me water to drink before I remembered that they were asleep already. Really these things look so far away when you’re buried in your sofa.
3. Screaming for any reason at all.
New neighbour stopped to say hi one day and said, “I guess you must be M. I hear your name shouted more.” Good Lord. Look what they turned me into. Which brings me to 4-
4. It’s their fault I’m yelling!
This one needs no explanation. My blame game is strong.
5. Taking sides in a fight. And then not taking sides in a fight.
This one I’ve come to learn is very tricky. Sometimes you want to dish out justice and other times you just want some peace so everybody, naughty corner now! No, I don’t want to hear it.
6. Bribing them.
Parenting one-oh-one right? Negotiating terms of engagement with a toddler is not a skill you pick up from self-help books. You may need to add a sprinkle of holy water and a well-timed treat also. These don’t always work though.
7. Doing breath checks.
Oh yeah. I developed a bionic sense of smell when I was expecting M. I will perceive foul breath from across the room and make them brush again even if we’re dressed up and heading out. Thanks Mum.
8. “Do it again, I dare you.”
Making threats has got to be on page 1 of the parents handbook. I’ve been in this battle of wills since they started crawling.
9. Following through on threats.
Flip right on to page 2 on the parents handbook. You don’t want them to think you’re a liar do you? You must follow through. A threat is like a promise so you must deliver.
There is clearly no perfect way to mother. I may have judged mine harshly while growing up, but I have learned to respect the choices she made (and other mothers of today) because I’m walking in those shoes now and they are my choices too.
Drop your comments below and tell me what other things your parents did that you thought you would never do. Or just let me know if you can relate with any of mine ☺